Neva's Copy of It's a Long Way to Heaven . . . by Abner Dean

In an unusual anatomical choice by cartoonist Abner Dean, the descending angel on the dustcover of his book It's a Long Way to Heaven . . . (1945) has wings which emanate not from his shoulder girdle but from his pelvis. The book's introduction is by Philip Wylie who, like Dean, worked for The New Yorker.

The volume offered by Carpetbagger Books of Woodstock, Illinois, was inscribed by the artist "Love to Neva / from / Abner Dean." An odd drawing of an alien stands there on the page, already in possession, it would appear, of a halo.

Abner Dean
AbeBooks listing accessed September 12, 2025

https://www.abebooks.com/signed-first-edition/Long-Way-Heaven-Dean-Abner-Farrar/32278597065/bd

Abner Dean
AbeBooks item description

05062

My Entry in The New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #936

The New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #936 appeared in the issue of March 17, 2025. Two angels are greeted by two aliens. The puzzled male angel speaks. The drawing is by Daniel Kanhai.

"We were so wrong in our theology."

March 29, 2025 Update:  The Finalists

April 6, 2025 Update:  I voted for the caption from Reston.

April 13, 2025 Update:  The Winner

04906 

Tom Funk: Unidentified Driving Object

A drawing by longtime New Yorker spot artist Tom Funk shows aliens at the wheel of a fanciful car. Was this indeed published in the pages of The New Yorker?

Tom Funk
eBay listing ended August 22, 2015

http://www.ebay.com/itm/Vintage-1950s-Pen-pencil-scetch-by-Tom-Funk-Artist-New-Yorker-Magazine-signed-/231654739241?hash=item35efb2cd29%3Ag%3A6-AAAOSwjVVVltPD&nma=true&si=YQGb25QThn5Fxe78BW8tTy6VzZY%253D&orig_cvip=true&rt=nc&_trksid=p2047675.l2557

Tom Funk
eBay item description

Tom Funk
eBay bid history
A single bid is placed way too early.

Note:  Original works of art by Tom Funk, including spots, are welcome here at Attempted Bloggery, the blog that saves the occasional eBay listing for nine years before posting it. Publication information for this drawing, should anyone somehow know it, would also be welcome.

04806

My Entry in The New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #895

Aliens walk among us in The New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #895 from the issue of May 6, 2024. My caption is shown below. The drawing is by E. S. Glenn.

"But what is the planet?"

May 15, 2024 Update:  The Finalists

May 25, 2024 Update:  I voted for the caption from Calgary, which is really a much better version of my own submission.

June 2, 2024 Update:  The Winner

04639

My Entry in The New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #874

It's autumn so naturally aliens are raking the leaves. It's The New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #874 from the issue of November 13, 2023. My caption is shown below. Clearly I'm not too proud. The drawing is by P. C. Vey.

"Please! There are some things we just won't clean up."

November 23, 2023 Update:  The Finalists

December 3, 2023 Update:  I voted for the caption from Los Angeles. 

December 4, 2023 Update:  The Winner

04501

The CartoonStock Cartoon Caption Contest No. 165

The alien invasion is underway in the CartoonStock Caption Contest #165. Let's go over how this monthly cash prize contest works: Five bucks buys up to three entries and that's it. Real cash prizes are $500 for first place and $100 for each of five runners up. As of this writing, I've spent—pardon me, invested—$50 over the first ten contests and this one makes it $55. I somehow managed to win $200 along the way but as more talented caption writers enter, I don't expect to keep doing this well. My three new entries are shown below, above the break. The full-color drawing of a small-scale invasion is by Juan Astasio.

"We may need to rethink the full-scale attack."
"No, I said they were small-MINDED."
"Everything looks so much bigger with these visors."
* * *
"We need to rethink tonight's menu."
"What do you say we abduct a shoe?"
"Save the death rays for our scouting party."
"Think about how we can scale this up."

July 4, 2023 Update:  The Winners

The judges deliberate:

04279

My Entry in The New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #836

This week, someone has made first contact in The New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #836 from the issue of January 30, 2022. My caption is shown below. The drawing is by E. S. Glenn.

"Got blue milk?"

These captions wouldn't fly:

"Take me to your leather."
"I was looking for more cowbell."

February 12, 2023 Update:  The Finalists

February 20, 2023 Update:  I voted for the caption from West Dennis.

February 27, 2023 Update:  The Winner

04215

My Entry in The New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #822

Pull up the covers and enjoy The New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #822 from the issue of October 10, 2022. My caption is shown below. The drawing is by P. C. Vey.

"And the children of Hamelin lived happily ever after in the mother ship."

These captions didn't reach launch velocity:

"And then all the children of Hamelin were vaporized."
"And then Goldilocks was abducted."
"And then Dorothy and her friends were lifted by the tractor beam into my spaceship."

October 18, 2022 Update:  The Finalists

October 24, 2022 Update:  I voted for the caption from Lake Oswego.

October 31, 2022 Update:  The Winner

 

 

04103

My Entry in The New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #808

I must have taken a wrong turn on my way to The New Yorker  Cartoon Caption Contest #808 from the issue of June 27, 2022. My caption is shown below. The drawing is by Kaamran Hafeez.

"We missed Roswell because he won't ask directions."

These captions wouldn't fly:

"How many does yours sleep?"
"How many can you abduct?"
"By the time we arrived at the spaceport, this was all they had."
"No one on earth seems to notice."
"We have the most abductees."
"We can do the medical experiments on board."
"At least the Air Force isn't looking for US."
"You never could blend in."

July 9, 2022 Update:  The Finalists

July 22, 2022 Update:  I voted for the caption from Issaquah.

July 25, 2022 Update:  The Winner

03999

My Entry in The New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #794

This week I tried to land my entry in The New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #794 from the issue of March 14, 2022. My caption is shown below. The drawing is by Charlie Hankin.

"They're suing for peace."

These captions were too alienating:

"Archie! Phone home!"
"It's about time they abducted some lawyers."

 

March 21, 2022 Update:  The Finalists

March 28, 2022 Update:  I voted for the caption from Staten Island. I've always wanted to say that.

April 10, 2022 Update:  The Winner

 

 

03903

My Entry in The New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #738

Below is my entry in The New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #738 for December 21, 2020. The drawing depicts an alien abduction and is by P. C. Vey.

"Whatever you say, but the experiments won't be any fun."

And the also-rans:

"If we take the big one, we won't meet our quota."
"You and I are going to set the record for earthling abductions."
"I didn't hear anyone say what sort of earthlings to abduct."
"Are you sure you understood our directive?"
"Roswell sure has changed."
"Let's dump them all on Area 51."
"He seems stunned. Now we abduct him."
"When did you develop a conscience?"
"When did you become a vegan?"
"He's not upset yet, but watch as we beam them down in the next yard."
"Didn't I tell you our priority is abducting before composting?"

January 11, 2021 Update:  The Finalists

January 18, 2021 Update:  I was late to the voting booth this week, but I have to go with the caption from Chicago.

January 25, 2021 Update:   The Winner

03479

The Cartoon Collections Caption Contest #87

Having recently run a few nearly indecipherable caption contests, Cartoon Collections relented somewhat on this one and explained for all to see that contest #87 features "aliens dining out." To be even more specific, the image file for the contest is labeled Alien Fois Gras. Perhaps that's too specific. Anyway, my caption entries are below. The drawing is by Ivan Ehlers.

"Tonight's special is Tang."
"I'm sorry, but I'm told your dinner just reached escape velocity."
"Any slime allergies?"
"Tonight we're featuring delicacies from Earth, anything but escargot."

August 19, 2020 Update:  The Winner

Quick Links to the Attempted Bloggery Archives:

Ivan Ehlers

Aliens

The Cartoon Collections Caption Contest

The New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest

The Moment Magazine Cartoon Caption Contest

All the Collected Cartoon Caption Contests

Attempted Bloggery's Tangy Index

03348

The Cartoon Collections Caption Contest #55

Let's beam up to the Cartoon Collections Caption Contest #55. The drawing is by Tom Toro.

"Get your hands off my thesis!"
"Let go of my science project!"
"Abduct your own damn alien!"

January 1, 2020:  The Winner

Quick Links to the Attempted Bloggery Archives:

Tom Toro

Little Green Men

The Cartoon Collections Caption Contest

The New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest

The Moment Magazine Cartoon Caption Contest

All These Cartoon Caption Contests and Then Some

Attempted Bloggery's Otherworldly Index

03117

Hello, Roswell: Four Space Cartoons by Bob Eckstein

It isn't every day that four space-themed cartoons by New Yorker cartoonist Bob Eckstein come up at auction, but that is precisely what's happening tomorrow in Mount Kisco, New York. The cartoons are unique hand-colored prints created in 2012 in an edition of precisely one. They are signed, numbered, and dated, but most of all they are funny.

"Heelllllooooo, Roswell!"
Bob Eckstein
Hand-colored limited edition 1/1, 2012

"Okay, buddy, touch your nose..."
Bob Eckstein
Hand-colored limited edition 1/1, 2012

Off Off Off Off Broadway
Bob Eckstein
Hand-colored limited edition 1/1, 2012

"That's why I never go near those crop circles."
Bob Eckstein
Hand-colored limited edition 1/1, 2012

Auction estimates are $50-100 each with bidding, which started at $1, already up to $15 to $20 for each piece. The auction takes place on Wednesday, May 8, 2019, at the Benefit Shop Foundation, Inc., a nonprofit that supports other local charities. The buyer's premium is 28%, but this is a win-win all around. The artwork comes matted. Further auction images plus links (in aqua) to register and bid are provided below. Better be quick about it.

Lot 0608:

Bob Eckstein
The Benefit Shop Foundation, Inc.
May 8, 2019
Lot 0608

https://www.liveauctioneers.com/item/71493054_signed-bob-eckstein-satirical-cartoon-illustration

Lot 0611:

Bob Eckstein
The Benefit Shop Foundation, Inc.
May 8, 2019
Lot 0611

://www.liveauctioneers.com/item/71535262_signed-bob-eckstein-satirical-cartoon-illustration

Lot 0612:

Bob Eckstein
The Benefit Shop Foundation, Inc.
May 8, 2019
Lot 0612

https://www.liveauctioneers.com/item/71535263_signed-bob-eckstein-satirical-cartoon-illustration

Lot 0614:

Bob Eckstein
The Benefit Shop Foundation, Inc.
May 8, 2019
Lot 0614

https://www.liveauctioneers.com/item/71535265_signed-bob-eckstein-satirical-cartoon-illustration

May 11, 2019 Update:  Sales Results

Quick Links to the Attempted Bloggery Archives:

Bob Eckstein

Little Green Men

Space Cartoons

Attempted Bloggery's One-Off Index

02917