It's time to dig up my entries in the Moment Cartoon Caption Contest for March/April 2018. Moment is a magazine of Jewish news and culture. Multiple entries are permitted in this contest. The drawing is by Benjamin Schwartz.
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"Why not have an oink-oink here and an oink-oink there?"
"How come Old MacDonald never wanted borscht?"
"You mean you really don't care that it's rabbit season?"
“Rabbi Angstrom? Rabbit Angstrom here. I’m afraid neither
one of us lives up to John Updike’s conception.”
"Dig, man, dig! Save a hand puppeteer!"
"We've had seven litters—what we call mitzvahs!"
"Here's my impression of Bugs Bunny reading Rabbit, Run: 'Eh... What's Updike?'"
"How much might it be worth to you if no one were to
disturb your crops through, say, Sukkot."
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My first and possibly best submitted caption owes much to a classic 1965 gag cartoon by the peerless Peter Arno. The original art has been in the Library of Congress since 1977 where it remains catalogued but not yet digitized—your tax dollars at work.
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"It's an oink-oink here, an oink-oink there, here an oink,
there an oink, everywhere an oink-oink."
Peter Arno
The New Yorker, February 20, 1965, page 37
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Here's an excerpt from the fine catalogue work done by the Library of Congress:
Sometimes truth is funnier than my captions.
Glossary of Jewish Humor: Pigs and rabbits are never kosher. Borscht is made from beets. Harry "Rabbit" Angstrom is the protagonist of John Updike's four Rabbit novels. His appearance in two of my submitted captions was the result of a suggestion—a challenge really—by fellow caption contestant Gerald Lebowitz. A mitzvah is literally a commandment, but in common usage it's a good deed to perform. Sukkot is the harvest festival.
May 14, 2018 Update: The Finalists
July 12, 2018 Update: Winning Caption
Note: Benjamin Schwartz is far and away the number one Caption Contest cartoonist on this blog. You can dig up all my past entries in the Moment Cartoon Caption Contest. See my take on Jewish humor.
Do you know the definition of a compulsive cartoon caption contest blogger? It's one who preserves every cartoon caption contest he ever entered. Visit my previous triumphs and travesties.
Attempted Bloggery supports net neutrality.
Despite almost seven years of almost daily online subversion, I have been unable to get the word bloggery into any print dictionary. The word, which I was not the first to coin but was the first to overuse, is listed only in the online Urban Dictionary. To the OED, it is a non-word. I urge careful writers to use the word bloggery whenever appropriate, particularly in print, and to forward all citations to the OED.
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