The CartoonStock Cartoon Caption Contest No. 200

In the CartoonStock Caption Contest number 200, a family relaxes at home. Each family member is armed, as are the pets and even the houseplant. The father speaks.

The rules of the monthly cash prize contest have not changed: Five dollars buys up to three entries. Real cash prizes are $500 for first place and $100 for each of five runners up. As of this writing, I've put $225 into the first forty-five pay-to-play contests and this forty-sixth challenge brings my total cash outlay up to $230. Having achieved runner-up status with three previous entries, I've collected $300 from CartoonStock, so I'm playing with the house's money, thank you very much. In fact, so few contestants enter that the odds may generally be considered favorable even for less-gifted caption writers. My three entries this round are shown below, above the break. The cartoonist is Liam Francis Walsh.

"I'd say we're ready for our Christmas card photo."
"What do you say we leave the doors unlocked?"
"Now how are we doing on butter?"
* * *
"The boy reads too many comics."
"I love our nuclear family."
"I always say, you can't have too much of a good thing."
"Here we are, the Johnson Family, locked and loaded."
"I love the Second Amendment—and our family."
"I told you I'd give you security."
"Feel safe?"
"What do you say we stand our ground today?"
"The bad guys wouldn't dare."

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